Editing Answering Machine Messages

{{Song
| Name        = Answering Machine Messages
| Cover       = BigBlackBus.png
| Artist      = [[Marilyn Manson & the Spooky Kids]]
| Album       = [[Big Black Bus]]
| Released    = April 1990
| Recorded    = 1990 in Miami, Florida
| Genre       = Alternative metal
| Length      = 15:54
| Label       = Beat Up Your Mom
| Writer      = 
| Composer    = 
| Producer    = [[Daisy Berkowitz]]
}}
"'''Answering Machine Messages'''" is the unofficial title of the otherwise untitled fifth and final track on the 1990 release ''[[Big Black Bus]]''. The track is made up of roughly 15 minutes of answering machine messages left on [[Marilyn Manson & the Spooky Kids]]' hotline, including messages in praise of the band, in disgust, and others of simple rambling for the sake of contacting the hotline. There were also many requests of information regarding the potential purchase of the band's tapes, which at the time would have been impossible according to [[Daisy Berkowitz]]'s confirmation that ''Big Black Bus'' was the band's first cassette to be publicly sold.

The track was often partially used as an intro or outro track during early live shows.

== Appearances ==
=== Cassettes ===
* ''[[Big Black Bus]]''


== Versions ==
* "Answering Machine Messages" <small>— Appears on ''Big Black Bus''.</small>
* "Answering Machine Messages" (Intro) <small>— Appears on various bootlegs of [[Marilyn Manson & the Spooky Kids]]' [[Marilyn Manson's independent touring|independent touring]].</small>

== Lyrics ==
 Tracy: ...your call. I just sit by the phone waiting for your call. I won't even go take a shower for fear that I might miss your call. They're afraid I'm gonna hurt somebody. They're afraid I'm gonna hurt myself. Does it smell in here?

 (feedback)

 Tracy: Kim? 

 Kim: Mm-hmm.

 Tracy: Over (?)

 Kim: Did you do it?

 Tracy: Yeah, I didn't click back to you?

 Kim: No.

 Tracy: I thought I did!

 Kim: No. 

 Tracy: Uh oh, I think I...

 Kim: Did you do it without laughing?

 Tracy: Hold on...

 (click) 

 Kim: Du-nu-du-nu-nu

 Tracy: Sitting by the phone 

 Kim: Du-nu-du-nu-nu

 Tracy: Givin' Marilyn Manson a call 

 Kim: Du-nu-du-nu-nu

 Tracy: And then I find out 

 Kim: Du-nu-du-nu-nu

 Tracy: He don't want me at all 

 Kim: Du-nu-du-nu-nu

 Tracy: So I'm just sitting here weeping 

 Kim: Du-nu-du-nu-nu

 Tracy: I fear the rejection 

 Kim: Du-nu-du-nu-nu

 Tracy: I really hope this message 

 Kim: Du-nu-du-nu-nu

 Tracy: Will give you an erection 

 Kim: Du-nu-du-nu-nu-do-do-do.. (etc.) 

 Tracy: Marilyn Manson, I wanna...

 Kim: Du-nu-du-du

 Tracy: In case you didn't know who left all these messages, I'm not gonna tell you! No, um, it's Tracy and my number, 
as I've left before is 749-9036.

 (click) 

 Paul (in fake British accent): Yeah, my name is Paul man, and my phone number is 978-9514 and I wanna get blown away dude! Cool!

 (click) 

 Tracy: Mmm-hmm. Uh oh.

 (click)

 Tracy: Kim?

 Kim: Yeah?

 (click)

 Kim: Marilyn, yes it's us again for the ninth time today 

 Tracy: And we've wrote a little song for you. 

 Kim: I'm sure you'll really enjoy it once you're done throwing up. Okay, one two three

 Together: We keep calling you but you don't call back, you don't call soon we're gonna turn you black, all these times we're pretty tired, so if you don't call back we'll set you on fire, word. Okay, we want those tapes and we want them now, and we're prepared to wait for the cows, mooo. You better call us back when you say you will, cause if you don't well have to kill, word. (cough, hack) 

 Kim: Okay, anyway this is ninth time and it's probably the last time..

 (beep)

 Some guy: Hi, you guys have the most bogus crapolla message I've ever heard in my life, and I'm gonna come see this trash because it's so fucking ridiculous.

 (click)

 Tracy: Kim, you're boring!... 

 Kim: (talking to another girl in the background) I know, okay, Stephanie I don't get any money. I just have a... what? What are you talking about? No, Stephanie, okay, I'll give you fifty dollars. Okay.. did you call yet? 

 Tracy: Yeah, um, Kim, we're leaving a message right now. 

 Kim: Oh (laughs) Stephanie, this is all being recorded on the guy's answering machine. 

 Tracy: Oh yeah.

 Kim: Stephanie... hang up the phone

 Tracy: Oh no, we're still being recorded. 

 Kim: Hang it up

 Tracy: Why? He never calls us.

 Kim: I know but Tracy, um, tell him what? Oh yeah, Stephanie's giving me the money so I can go to Universal and I'll 
 have to pay her back, I just have to give her back the fifty dollars which is interest anyway cause...

 (beep)

 Some guy (in fake Brooklyn accent): You're a skinny fuckin' runt douchebag. 

 Kim: Hi, it's Kim again but you should be really thankful this is only the first time that I've called today, but um, okay, it's Friday night and it's 9:34 and 49 seconds and I was wondering if you had a tape for me yet? And if you do, like, you know, could I get it like tomorrow? And, if you, like, if you're going to insist on sending me on a wild goose chase after it, then well, I guess I could handle that but um, just like you know me and Tracy were thinking bout maybe like we could get it tomorrow or something. Just think about it. And I want underwear too. 

 (click)

 Paul (in fake British accent): 'allo, 'allo, do tell. My name is George McCartney (?) and I should call you again. 

 (click)

 John: ...853-7496. My name is John, uh, and Jim Camacho. 653-8218. Uh, we really, we really would like to win this um, thing. Jim? 

 Jim: Ever since... ever since the first night when we...(a sudden loud noise interrupts)... and that spooky lane of, I'm reminiscing, I, I had that, that vibe to call, and now this gives me a real reason that I just want to (clears throat) a, you know, a real reason to call. Beacause, you know, it's, it's a hotline. I figure it's perfect.

 Some girl (voice is slurred and quiet): I wanna see you god... feel you so bad I can almost taste it. 
 (sudden loud guitar sound from Rage Against The Machine's "Freedom" interrupts for about two seconds - see below - then a busy signal) 

 Elaina: Hi Marilyn, my name is Elaina. I'm one of Tracy's friends and she just gave me this number...

 (loud, slowed down music interrupts. Elaina can still be heard faintly talking in the background. I doubled the speed of the music in Sound Forge, and it turns out it's a 2 min 20 sec. live audience recording of Rage Against The Machine playing "Wake Up" off of their first album. I already hear you thinking "but wait a minute, their first album didn't come out until 1992, and this tape was supposedly released in 1991!" I thought maybe that the band had toured around Florida in '91 but I checked out a RATM tour date archive and it looks like their first show was in late '91 and even in '92 they only played in California. It's possible that the recording that I have did somehow get the RATM stuff mixed in by another trader at some point. However, it would also make sense that the recording is slowed down from the original answering machine tape, because cassette answering machines often would use slower tapes speeds to increase the recording length. If somehow the record head on the machine did not erase that section of the tape, then when the phone messages were recorded over it, it would be slowed down to half speed when played back. Another possible explanation would be that they later reissued the tape in '92 or '93, with the phone messages on the back. This could also explain the second variant of the cover. Also, you may have noticed that several people calling the hotline were asking about tapes, which would be unusual if Big Black Bus was the first tape actually released to the public.)

 Elaina: 

 (more messages play in the background, it's hard to decipher under the music) 

 (loud music ends)

 TV commercial: ... all of these mean nothing.

 (beep)

 (song being played into the phone): Twisted Sister, come out and play! Twisted Sister, come out and play! {note: from Twisted Sister's "Come Out And Play" album, duh!} 

 Bill: Alright fellow, give me a call. This is Bill. Bye.

 (click)

 Jason: Hi this is Jason, I love you guys. Give me a call at 437-4210. Thank you.

 (click)

 Some Guy: My dog barks (film?)

 (click)

 Guy: Where do we get tape info, huh? 467-6425.

 (click)

 Sparkles' Dad: You still there, who was it? 

 Sparkles: Say, "this is Sparkles' Dad"

 Sparkles' Dad: This is Sparkles' Dad. We don't have a problem here, we happen to like your music so how do we go from here? My phone number is 341-9341. Thank you very much, bye bye. 

 (click)

 Christine: Hey Marilyn baby, I'm a big fat siamese cat and I'm interested in you. Why don't you call me some time. My name's Christine. I forget the phone! (laughs) 

 (click)

 Christine: Hey Marilyn, it's me the big fat siamese cat with no rake. Sorry but my bitsy horny dog, you know she like stepped on the phone, I think she was trying to use it as a dildo. But you know man, you guys sound like really cool, I'm like really intrigued by you. It's Christine and why don't you call me some time cowboy. Maybe we can go for a ride. As you can tell, I have this like, enourmously like sex drive and I don't know, just call me back. 742-2572. Later man. 

 (click)

 Woman (maybe Manson's mom): Hey, when you come Wednesday night, bring me directions to the junkyard please. Okay, bye. 

 (beep) 

 Julie: Hey Marilyn, the coolest thing happened today at school, you're not gonna believe this right? So it's like I'm sitting in the caffeteria right, and it's no big thing, I'm just being bored and waiting for something to happen, right, so there's this girl, I don't know who she is, I still don't know her name, well anyways this is really weird, okay, so anyway I'm sitting there and she has a picture on her folder and I get up to look at it and I realize she was wearing Marilyn on her shirt and I'm like freaking out and I said to her "Where'd you get that shirt? Where'd you get that shirt?" and she's like.. and I'm like I'll buy it off you for $20 and she's like if you get me money I'll get you a shirt at the concert on Friday, I'm going to the concert on Friday and I'm like, wait, you got that shirt at a concert and she's like, yeah, I don't know if you know her, she's like Chinese and she's got really long hair with a streak and I don't know and actually..

 (beep)

 Julie: Anyways, like I was saying, right, I was freaking out and she's like, Julie...

 (end) 

{note: Julie rambles so damn fast it's almost impossible to make out every word. But that's the general gist of her message.}

Lyrics taken from http://spookykids.net/indexxx.html

== Trivia ==
* American heavy metal band Twisted Sister's "Come out and Play" can be heard in the background during Bill's message.
* American rapcore band Rage Against the Machine's "Wake Up" can be heard in the background during Elaina's message.
* Eight people left [[Marilyn Manson & the Spooky Kids|the band]] their home phone numbers.
* Towards the end of the playback, an anonymous woman leaves a message saying, "Hey, when you come Wednesday night, bring me directions to the junkyard please. Okay, bye." It is speculated that this message was left by [[Barb Warner]], [[Marilyn Manson]]'s mother.

[[Category:1989-1995 era]]
[[Category:Marilyn Manson & the Spooky Kids songs]]